Where is my mind?

So, sometimes I blame myself, sometimes I blame others. But mostly I think I blame myself. It's not impossible you know. It's not even hard. But I just can't do it, I just hate it, I'll fail. "If you can dream it, you can do it" I love that motto but it's hard to follow it ... And "think positive, be positive" and so on .... it's easier said than done! Well it isn't that hard maybe, if you just put some effort in it.. Maybe if I was better it wouldn't be like this, maybe it wouldn't have happened, everything would be just fine. ?

I'm sorry, my head is just a hole with a mashed boiled brain right now. I can't concentrate I can't think I can't feel... Well that's just how I deal with things, I become passive and shut down. It's like I have an "Off-switch" or something. . I feel that familiar sinking feeling in my stomach, and my friend Empty is taking place in my head.

I'm glad that I'll be with Amalia within a few hours, and then stuff I've erased, and later tonight I'm off to Carro and we'll eat tacos and I'll sleep at her place :D

Yday my lil' sis made "chokladbollar/kokosbollar/negerbollar" xD it was super yummie! :D And later I went to Carro, I slept there, but she had to work today so I went home to my dad's empty place this morning, and I'm watching Disney Channel, they're showing TINKER BELL ! :D

PEACE!